so it appears that somehow i made it out of my teen years alive.
twenty, so far, has been hard and heavy. my birthday was on reading week, so after going to montreal to visit sadie, then swinging home to sarnia for a few days, i was exhausted. i still am exhausted. i’ve only been twenty for twelve days, and it’s been a rollercoaster of emotions and nostalgia for my past, for my teen years, my youth, or whatever.
because as everyone knows, high school was both the best and worst of times. i had an overall glittery and wonderful time in high school, but i can also remember sitting in my third period media class, tears dripping down my face, wanting to not exist for awhile. i’m still having that crisis, i guess, but it just manifests itself in different ways. like today, when ribs by lorde came on during my bus ride home, and my heart hurt for the past.
but i guess that’s the human condition- we always are dying to get to the weekend, to the summer, through the next year, but then we want it all back. it always seems so much simpler when you look back, doesn’t it?
though i’m nostalgic for the past, i’m really freakin’ thankful for everyone who’s in my life now. it’s been a long time since real negativity has come my way, and i’m so happy that i’m surrounded by so many wonderful human beings. thank you, all of you. i wouldn’t be writing this without your unconditional luv and support.
anyway, i’m hoping to be out of this crisis and back on the map after this weekend. i’ve been neglecting schoolwork, blogging, extracurriculars, stitching, eating properly… yeah. i’m a mess. i know.
thanks for sticking around.